The Year-In Slump

Warning: this post has a high probability of becoming whiny, but sometimes you just have to write a rant about feelings and post it to your blog.

When I first saw this graph, I thought it was silly. How could they generalize all volunteers experiences into one handy graphic? Everyone's Peace Corps experience is so different and unique!

Now, however, it's been 12-14 months, and the one-year slump, or "mid-service crisis" is very real. Things that illustrate this point in list-form:

- I find myself missing people and places from home a lot more often than before 

- I have this recurring dream where I'm in a grocery store in the US and buying all the food I miss (most recently fruit, and more specifically raspberries and grapes)

-  I'm getting frustrated at my job and unfairly taking it out on the people around me

-  I keep worrying that I'm not doing enough in my job and that my two years here will not have done anything to improve the IT systems at the Provincial Offices. While I'm not expecting a massive overhaul of the entire system, it's disheartening to think I'm spending two years here only to know that when I leave there's a strong chance everything will go back to exactly the way it was before I got here

- My patience with people is much lower than it should be, especially people with computer issues
- I miss playing sports. So much. I miss them so much I've even started running, and I hate running!

I love Peace Corps, I love Vanuatu, and I love Ambae. Even though right now that may not but 100% how I feel, I keep that mantra going in my head to remind myself that this is just a slump. Peace Corps is hard, and that's okay. Next week I head to Vila for MST (Mid-Service Training), and I think this break from the island is exactly what I need to get back on track.